literature

Bravura

Deviation Actions

Zark123's avatar
By
Published:
432 Views

Literature Text

A man who needs a rifle
To assert his words in lead,
Can never rally his nerves
Like the man who's fallen dead.

The eyes of the hunter twitch
While the eyes of the hunted stare,
There is acceptance in silence
As there never was in a prayer.

He who preserves his mettle  
For the rawest imbrued breath,
Smiles cordially at his killer
Before he conquers death.


  





  
'I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back."' ~ General Maximus Decimus Meridius, Gladiator (2000)
Comments11
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
haijinik's avatar
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Vision
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star: Impact

vision: the writer definitely delivers their point without flogging a deceased equine. the motive thought is reiterated in each stanza in fresh language and images.

originality: i can't say there aren't OTHER poems on the subject, but the brisk sharpness of the delivery subject matter definitely is different from most poems about death or killing i have come across, which tend to get too maudlin or morbid.

technique: the stark delivery and curt rhymes reinforce the fluidity of the piece rather than becoming sing-songy, which is always a danger with this type of form.

impact: right between the eyes: a kill shot.